Carmela Snelbaker

Monthly Archives: June 2023

• 

  embrace different …. you are perfectly human

  Posted at 9:53 AM by carmelasnelbaker

  Jun 25th

  Every Soul on earth has the ability to leave a positive influence on another persons life.

  We all live through different experiences and have many different abilities and will have many different paths in life.

  When I first began working as a caregiver I met a person who made the greatest positive impact on my life without ever speaking a word.

  This amazing person was 26 when I first met him. Because of an accident at the age of 11 he was completely paralyzed and unable to speak. He was completly cognitively aware and was able to answer any questions with eye blinks for yes or no.

  It is NOT easy to learn to communicate with people in a manner that requires US to change the way that has always been our “usual” way of communicating with most people. Once I became comfortable with adjusting my usual manner of communication …. And learned more about him by learning to phrase questions differently, without being able to speak one word this man made an amazingly positive impact on my life.

  The words in this post are being written for ALL THE PEOPLE who have changed my life for the better by being “DIFFERENT”!
  YOU DO NOT HAVE TO CHANGE TO “FIT INTO SOCIETY’S VIEW OF ACCEPTABLE OR NORMAL BEHAVIOR IN ORDER TO LEAVE A POWERFUL AND POSITIVE IMPACT ON THE WORLD.

  Every soul on this earth has the power to teach us something!

  I pray that our hearts are open to the lessons other souls are able to teach EVEN if it requires US to make some adjustments to our usual ways.

  When we chose to stay stagnant in the “normal” manner of communication and acceptance toward others, we miss getting to know and Love many amazing human beings!

  My heart is writing this for those who are physically or cognitively unable to respond in this manner…. Please consider the reality that some day any one of us could be unable to speak our opinions so easily!

  If we are forced to sit in silence and wait for someone to be willing to change for us….. might we think differently about our dismissal of change while we still had the ability to be so set in our “usual ways with vocal abilities”?
  

  IT IS OK TO BE DIFFERENT.

  YOU ARE NOT A PROBLEM.

  YOU ARE NOT A MISTAKE.

  YOU ARE PERFECTLY HUMAN.

  YOU DON’T NEED FIXING OR SOLVING IN THE EYES OF GOD

  YOU ARE EXACTY HOW GOD MADE YOU.

  With Respect, Hope, Joy, and Love, Carmela

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  Posted in Meditative Writings
• 

  Long Journeys Need Smiles

  Posted at 12:40 PM by carmelasnelbaker

  Jun 19th

  When I seen the sign “You Are NOT Almost There” it made me laugh, and remember a time many years ago when my daughter and I eagerly embarked on a day hike 6 miles into the Grand Canyon.

  Guess What?

  6 miles down is a breeze……..

  6 miles up at 110 degrees is NOT……. lol

  In support and outreach to others………

  On our challenging journey out of the Canyon (although we did not make a sign) we were sure to caution every passing hiker on the way into the canyon!

  DOWN IS EASY…. but…. UP IS NOT EASY

  Life is not always fun and we sometimes make choices or eagerly follow a path that turns out to take us on quite a different journey then we once expected!

  Thankfully when you put Faith in a Higher Power you are NOT in this alone.

  Sometimes it is more about what you are walking away from than what you are walking to.

  Possibly the most important thing we find when walking away from difficult experiences is an amazing inner strength that somehow carrys our body’s through disasters when our minds are numb and our muscles simply roboticly move us forward.

  Survival instinct may not always be about an amazing human strength that powers us through difficult challenges but quite possibly better explained as the intuitive Power of Divine Guidance.

  I also believe in something my family likes to refer to as Divine Comic Relief. These are times within the saddest or most serious moments we are experiencing when something happens and in within the most serious of times you can’t help but laugh.

  We need smiles to get us through the tearful times!

  I like to believe those times as well are sent to us from God.

  Recently I have been enjoying a lot of time in the woods walking on trails. There is a peacefulness in the atmosphere, the fragrances and songs of the birds keep your mind anchored in the present moment. There is nothing more calming the enjoying then truly experiencing the very moment you are in without distraction.

  “We need to find God and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is the friend of silence. See how nature, trees, flowers, grass, grow in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun, how they move in silence. We need silence to be able to touch souls”. Mother Teresa

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  Many years ago someone recomended a book to me called Grandma Gatewoods Walk. It is a true story about amazingly strong lady who simply read an article in National Geographic magazine about the Appalachian Trail and then just decided to thru hike it…….. she knew her family would advise her against it so she just decided to tell them she was going on a walk…… leaving out the fact that it was a two thousand and fifty mile long walk. LOL

  Emma Gatewood was 67 years old when she decided to take this walk!

  She eventually did have to be truthful with her family when national publications began following her to publish articles on her solo thru hike.

  You can read more about her here Appalachian Trail Histories/Emma Gatewood

  I have shared the audio version of this book with elderly individuals I have taken care of. Many of them found it very interesting and recognized some of the local history that was referenced as she was traveling through the local areas of the Appalachian Trail in Pennsylvania. I will share a link here if you are interested in possibly sharing it with others.

  I pray all those struggling through difficult paths find Peaceful Moments, Silent times to be with God, and some Heaven sent smiles to keep you moving forward and finding Hope.

  With Hope, Joy, Peace and Love, Carmela

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  Posted in Meditative Writings | Tagged Carmela Snelbaker, family, gratitude, hope, inspiration, joy, kindness, love, peace, positivity, respect, sense of humor, support
• 

  Staying Afloat More Ways Than One

  Posted at 12:49 AM by carmelasnelbaker

  Jun 18th

  As a person who loves the water the words “staying afloat” trigger relaxing feelings, the gentle movement of the water as well as a freedom from harsh controls.

  I suppose like everything it is all about perspective.

  To some staying afloat might not trigger relaxing feelings, but possibly one of survival and attempting to stay above instead of going under.

  In complete contrast, I suppose it makes sense when I reflect upon the times in my life that have caused recurring dreams.

  If floating in water makes me feel freedom…….. then plunging into water trapped inside a car that is filling up with water…….. must be my brain finding a way for my body to survive during times when traumatic events have taken control over my life.

  I remember talking with a wife of a man who I cared for about recurring dreams. She explained of a time when her husband, who was living with a disability and working full time, had a relapse of his condition, that caused his health to decline to the point that he lost the ability to continue working.

  She kept having dreams that she was traveling down the road in a car, she was the one who was driving the car but in the dream she needed to keep the car on the road while being seated in the backseat of the car.

  IS THIS SIMPLY OUR SUBCONSCIOUS MINDS SEARCHING FOR WAYS TO REGAIN CONTROL? OR POSSIBLY A HIGHER POWER REACHING OUT TO CATCH US, WAKE US AND REDIRECT US FROM OUR FEAR AND WEAKEN STATE OF FAITH?

  I am not sure why my mind is always attempting to find, answers for, or lessons from, challenging events in life. I suppose it might be better explained as Seeking or a Continuous Search For Hope.

  WITHOUT FINDING SOME SORT OF LOGIC REASON OR UNDERSTANDING IN WHAT APPEARS TO BE MEANINGLESS EVENTS OR ENCOUNTERS, WHAT REASON DO WE HAVE TO CONTINUE ON?

  Judge a man by his questions rather than by his answers. – Voltaire

  Thankfully among the serious parts of life, God sends us “blessing messengers” to deliver smiles and good memories to keep us going. This is how our latest blessing unfolded…….

  I love music and particularly music with a positive message. About a month ago my copilot for the day and I were listening to one of my favorite songs Build A Boat by Colton Dixon

  This song led to a conversation about boats………… The conversation then led to a question ………”Have you ever seen a boat you can drive a car onto?” ………… Which then led to a trip to see the boat that takes cars across the river.

  

  

  

  

  

  When we first arrived to see the boat it was in dry dock having repairs before it was time for it to set sail.

  The interest and anticipation for taking a ride on the boat kept us returning to keep track of its progress.

  We watched the repairs, it’s entry into the water, had conversations with local boaters as we walked along the river.

  We even began to get recognized as the freaquent riverfront visitors who wanted to take “A Red Car on a Boat ride”.

  We checked in on its progress weekly and enjoyed the many riverside swings that are overlooking the river, skipping rocks in the river, taking walks along riverfront park, as well as walks at the Local Ned Smith Nature and Art Center. And enjoyed a snack and drink at the Peace of Mind Cafe.

  The day finally arrived that we were able to Open the Door toward the river to call the Ferry Boat to come pick us up.

  Once the existing passengers left the ferry we were directed on by the Captain and crewman and our departure for the opposite side of the river began. My copilot’s excitement was contagious and the smiles were plentiful! What a fun and memorable experience, and beautiful reminder that God supports us through the difficult times by leading us to those who have the ability to keep us smiling and keep us afloat while we regain control through life’s storms.

  With Respect, Hope, Joy and Love, Carmela

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• 

  “Well, I guess one can’t be Jealous without showing it”

  Posted at 10:24 AM by carmelasnelbaker

  Jun 5th

  God how I wish things just made sense. I wish life events just stop hitting so hard. Sometimes I truly want to stop my life and ask God, “Where do I get the bus that takes me out of here. Please, I have had enough now!”

  So to all the people who feel grand inadequacy, lonelyness and confusion……. I am with you! I am willing to bet there are many of us out there.

  To all the people who find it hard to put words or comprehensive thoughts to the feelings behind the inadequacy, I understand I struggle with this daily and have for quite some time. Life is fluid, always changing and at times hard to keep up with.

  I have found that during each current struggle with prayer, reflection and purging of words onto paper some amount of understanding or clarity begins to show. In some respects there may never be the “right” answer but if we examine the feelings behind the issues we can, at the very least, find some sort of empathy toward the opposing view.

  When I was in my thirties I quit my full-time job to be with my mother, who had just found out she would most likely have only 6 more months to live. Although measured time is very treasured and I am forever grateful for every additional moment I was able to spend with her, at the time I was very upset with the doctor for telling my mother her time was so limited. It weighed heavy on her mind and the sadness was devestating.

  After my mom had died and life began to get back to normal I met someone in my workplace who I immediately seemed to have a dislike for. This bothered me to a level that I was constantly trying to understand why I felt that way toward them. I eventually realized that it was the fact that they were always full of complaints, stories and frustrations about their mother. As a person who had recently watched her mother go from looking like a healthy 57 year old to looking like she was twice that age before dying just 6 months later this was hard to hear.

  When I examined those feeling even deeper I realized that the emotion that was causing this dislike toward that person was one of Jealousy. I was jealous of this person because she had a mother and I disliked her because she was not appreciative of the fact that her mother was alive.

  Putting words to feelings eventually helps with healing, although Life is messy and our scars and devastations will always be a part of who we are. Emotional experiences can build the foundation of empathetic characteristics. I know my past experiences help me have Patience and Love for others who are also struggling and acting a bit irrational during the most difficult and unfair events that unfold in life.

  Do I wish life would be easier? Absolutely.

  Do I wish all the hurt would end? Of course.

  Will I always resist deep heart pain and loss like a toddler kicking and screaming no I can’t go there again? Most certainly.

  Will I always want to prevent or improve painful moments for others? Yep, because empathetic hearts hurt for other people as well as themselves.

  The one thing I know for sure is I totally appreciate my parents and their quirky manner of guiding us through life! As youngsters if we were complaining about another person, instead of a lecture or explanation a simple comment like “Well, I guess one can’t be jealous without showing it.” would be enough said……… Leaving people to figure it out for themselves might be the answer. Along with prayer for an unstoppable longing to figure out what the “next right thing to do is”

  With Respect, Hope, Joy and Love, Carmela

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  Posted in Meditative Writings | Tagged Carmela Snelbaker, emotional health, faith, gratitude, hope, hurt, inspiration, joy, love, peace, positivity, respect

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