Might prevention from ever uttering a negative thought, also prevent a positive solution? ……….
Might prevention from ever uttering a negative thought, also prevent a positive solution? ……….
May all things good ( Love ) always prevail over all things not good ( Evil ) ❤️🙏❤️
❤️❤️❤️
So many times I hear many people complain about the “children of today” being so self centered and having grand feelings of “entitlement”.
As a caregiver to many adults with disabilities who has had to read so many childhood medical histories that have included tragic childhood abuses……… I feel I need to caution people on casting such a judgmental eye on “today’s youth”! Without having access and details of each individual’s past, one has NO IDEA what another person may have lived through and may be actively recovering from.
The past 7 months have been, a very messy, emotional fueled confusing yet also a beautiful unfolding of stories within a number of peoples lives including my own.
As I write this in the middle of the night I am sitting in a room with a broken door lock. That lock was intentionally broken by another individual who was angry and attempting to gain access to me. I cannot actually recall exact events leading up to the reason why I felt the need to have a locked door between me and that person, but details of that encounter bears no importance to the True basis of this story.
I have spent many years de-escalating out of control individuals when working within the behavioral health field, and even experienced minor injuries intervening to protect other individuals. Even though you have extensive training, and know the steps to take if you find yourself in a hair pull or aggressive attack ……. when the boundary encroachment occurs within a personal relationship the injuries one experiences are of a completely different nature.
Relationship boundary aggression wounds and recovery are very different than the step by step training of how to get out of a hair pull, or physical strongholds that you may encounter while protecting others from a violent outburst. It is possible to walk away and continue on once free from any further threat but never really address the wound or fear left behind. Simply avoiding ever taking a chance at another disaster happening again can be a pretty easy fix. When you have a Love for people and enjoy caring for others you can get great satisfaction from helping others.
In the process of meeting, working with and getting to know a very sweet and beautiful person just 7 months ago, It has made me realize the simple broken “lock disaster” of the relatively recent past years had left some pretty major scars and personal space/relationship issues.
But less about me and more about my beautiful young friend who is making some very positive improvement! She is taking HUGE steps toward her own independence and away from vary harsh boundary encroachments of her past.
Every once in awhile I get a very unhappy and distraught call and spend some time discussing some positive ways of de-stressing or redirecting the frustrations, But the happy calls of excitement and pride of accomplishment are the ones that warm my heart the most and make me smile.
Life is never going to be perfect in anyones life and everyone most likely has had and will continue to have difficult times to overcome.
The beauty is in the fact that once we “weather a storm” and experience a brighter day….It helps us to recognize situations and times of struggle within other peoples lives, even if that person is not fully understanding what is happening to them and are not able to clearly verbalize how they may be in need of help.
Possibly our personal experiences and scars can be a beautiful blessing to another, if we are able to recognize and put words to a situation another person appears to be experiencing however is unable to fully comprehend and verbalize themselves. Because of this I suppose we should be thankful for our scars and the ability to help others thrive.
With Respect, Hope, Joy, and Love, Carmela
When you identify beauty with Love and Joy you cannot help but Also identify Beauty within the opposite of Love and Joy (Fear and Rage).
How can we not when all of human existence will at some time experience the entire array of elements. When the Rage is directed at what is wrong and not at the individual who acts in a way that is provoking the radical reaction, there is a beauty within the advocacy for what is Right and True.
In no way am I encouraging or making excuses for anger or angry aggression I am acknowledging that without being emotionally stirred to stand up against unnecessary control, aggressive boundary encroachments, violence or life altering restrictive acts toward other human beings we will only find ourselves living a selfish existence.
Greed and shallow materialism flourishes within an environment that will only allow “like minded viewpoints”.
When we fail to be open to finding common ground and embracing the need to express and celebrate collective knowledge, experiences, and wisdom, We cannot state that we truly are supporting of Truth and Freedom.
Individual Truth is Freedom. When we seek only power and control for like minded views we are not embracing UNITY AND FREEDOM FOR ALL.
Truth and Honesty are based in Love no matter what “vehicle” of understanding you are approaching it with. True Unconditional Love and understanding embraces the opposing view. When we choose a divided state of being we choose Stagnancy and Lack of Growth and Development.
When we choose stagnancy we are caught within a shallow human power struggle for control and authority.
Those who live in fear may attempt to arm themselves with dishonest words, accusations and threats. Those that have little confidence, faith or understanding may be easily influenced to believe or simply cave to the threats and shame tactics and become compliant to the one who chooses human power and authority over everyone.
True Love embraces unity and understanding. True Unconditional Love shows support for individualism and embraces growth change and peaceful solutions.
Who are we to attempt to feel so boldly aggressive that we would choose to enforce individual opinion and belief onto others when we would NOT stand for that being done in reverse?
Those who cannot be respectful of other people’s beliefs and boundaries, are also not being respectful of what they wish for themselves.
When we act as though our ways and beliefs are MORE RIGHT than any other belief we begin to become only seekers of POWER instead of seekers of TRUTH, UNITY AND PEACE.
IN A WORLD WITH MANY DIFFERENT PEOPLE AND BELIEF SYSTEMS REMAINING RESPECTFUL TO ALL RELIGIONS AND BELIEF SYSTEMS OR INDIVIDUALS WHO SEEK TRUTH AND LOVE IS ESSENTIAL.
THOSE ORGANIZED RELIGIONS OR PEOPLE WHO CHOSE TO BE ENFORCERS OF ONLY THIER WAY OR THEIR LIMITED VERSION OF TRUTH ARE PUTTING THEMSELVES AND THEIR LIMITED HUMAN UNDERSTANDING ABOVE DIVINE WILL.
WHEN WE TRULY SEEK UNCONDITIONAL LOVE FOR ALL WE ENGAGE WITH AND LEARN AND UNDERSTAND FROM EACH OTHER.
DIVINE MESSAGES OFTEN COME THROUGH HUMAN HEARTS THAT ARE OPEN TO AND LONG TO RECEIVE, UNDERSTANDING AND RELAY DIVINE THOUGHTS
THEY WILL NEVER CLAIM TO HAVE THE ANSWERS.
LIFE IS FLUID AND EVER CHANGING WHAT THE MESSAGE MAY BE ON THIS DAY CAN BE A VERY DIFFERENT MESSAGE ON ANOTHER.
TRUE DIVINE MESSAGES ARE RELAYED BY PEOPLE WHO HAVE EXPERIENCED DIVINE STRENGTH, GUIDANCE, AND HOPE IN TIMES WHEN DEVASTATING EVENTS PULL THEM INTO HOPELESSNESS AND CONFUSION
THE TRUE MESSAGE WILL MAKE IT TO YOU WHEN YOU NEED IT .
THE MESSENGER MAY NEVER EVEN BE AWARE THAT THEIR WORDS WERE WHAT YOU NEEDED TO HEAR, BECAUSE THE MOST POWERFUL DIVINE ENCOUNTERS OFTEN COME ANONYMOUSLY THROUGH CHANCE ENCOUNTERS WITH HUMBLY BROKEN INDIVIDUALS WHO SIMPLY MADE IT THROUGH DIFFICULT SITUATIONS, WITH DIVINE SUPPORT AND GUIDANCE
PLEASE TAKE THE TIME TO LISTEN TO THE INTERVIEW BELOW WITH BLESSING OFFOR’S
TWO OF MY FAVORITE SONGS OF HIS ARE…. BELIEVE AS WELL AS BRIGHTER DAYS I HOPE YOU WILL SEARCH FOR THEM ON YOU TUBE. I AM NOT ABLE TO LINK THEM HERE BUT THEY ARE BEAUTIFUL SONGS WITH POSITIVE MESSAGES.
With Hope, Joy, Peace and Love, Carmela
One of my favorite songs……. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.
With Love, Hope, Joy and Peace, Carmela
I must say I have a Fierce Advocate within me that every once in awhile takes over and lashes out in defense of all things wrong. I much prefer the Peaceful, Content, and Joyful feelings any day to the frustrated and angry upheaval!
It is sometimes very hard once a very negative event touches your heart to not get pulled down so heavily with the injustices that the Good begins to be overlooked. I once read that there are 6 events that are written about in the Bible that stirred Jesus to Anger.
For the past 7 months I have met some of the most beautiful people who have touched my heart greatly but also stirred in my heart great emotional ups and downs.
There was a daily post challenge awhile ago asking writers to describe what they liked about themselves. I find that a very difficult thing to do.
I truly believe as we grow in our Faith with each new understanding we begin to realize that who we are and what is our Greatest Quality, is our Faithfulness to the Greater Power. For the True Beauty within us is the Fruit of the Holy Spirit…………
LOVE, JOY, PEACE, PATIENCE, KINDNESS, GOODNESS, FAITHFULNESS, GENTLENESS AND SELF- CONTROL.
I will keep Praying, Walking and Responding……….
With Love, Hope, Joy and Peace, Carmela
Sharing your life with others as a caregiver or support staff is a blessing and an amazing opportunity for personal growth as well. I have been doing this type of work my entire life and truly each one of the individuals I have had the privilege of meeting and working with have definately improved my life for the better.
Many times our lifestyles and cultural backgrounds differ in many ways but once you are able to spend time with, share experiences with the person, understand their manner of communication and build trust with them amazing similarities surface and you learn from each other.
Life has often been challenging for many of the people I have taken care of for their entire life, and others unpredictable circumstances have caused major changes in their lives as adults.
I have spent many hours within the community assisting people who use wheelchairs, who use walkers or have vision or hearing difficulties as well as those with autism or intellectual or developmental disabilities.
The community can often be difficult for those with differences to navigate and feel comfortable or confident functioning in.
Even with the many accommodations and upgrades that have now been added there are still are many “road blocks” that have been overlooked in the overall design of things that will often end up being a huge problem for someone who functions differently then the majority of the population.
Many times other individuals in the community are the problem.
Handicap vans need room to drop a ramp to EXIT and ENTER accessible spaces. If someone parks beside the van in the lined off “ramp space” The person in the wheelchair is not able to get into the van when they return. They must find the person and ask them to move or wait until that person finishes their appointment or errand and returns!
As a caregiver I have found some locations where employees have been extremely helpful offering assistance eager to engage in conversation with the person I am supporting and other location that have been very dismissive and seem to be uncomfortable interacting with those with a different level of ability then the majority of the population.
We need to find a way to leave positive feedback for the places that are easily accessed by those with disabilities and even better feedback for those who are welcoming, friendly and enjoy interacting and giving positive customer service to everyone including those with different abilities.
Please if you are a person who has. grown up and had very little exposure to or experience communicating with people with differences please say hello to and treat all people with equal respect and value. No-one wants to be treated differently, dismissed or laughed at for their differences.
I once had someone dismiss my concerns by stating that it was simply a lifestyle difference.
There are no lifestyle differences that cannot be improved upon.
CHOOSE KINDNESS,
CHOOSE RESPECT FOR DIFFERENCES,
CHOOSE TO SEE LIKENESS INSTEAD OF DIFFERENCE,
NEVER LAUGH OR DISMISS SOMEONE FOR THEIR DIFFERENCES
At any moment our lives could change drastically.
What was once easily accessible to us may no longer be accessible. Our ability to freely communicate feelings or needs to others may no longer be possible.
The lifestyle that you once enjoyed could change in an instant.
I pray people one day realize that things that they might find humorous today may not be very funny if they are ever forced to endure what others are enduring on a daily basis.
With Respect, Hope, Joy and Love, Carmela
Imagine this……A day starting with showing up to the job you love…. asking my “co-pilot for the day”…… “What do YOU want to do today?”
It appears to be a beautiful warm day….. so we talk over some outdoor options and SHE GETS A HUGE SMILE AND SAYS YES TO PEDDLE BOATING!
So off we go….. my co-pilot and I LOVE DRIVING AND SINGING, we pull up some FAVORITE HAPPY SONGS…… and off we go to the lake……… singing some upbeat inspirational Jamie Grace songs ……
We rent our boat, my co-pilot chooses her life-vest and chooses one for me and off we go on our happy relaxing adventure! LOL
The rental agent helps us get our boat into the water and our JOURNEY begins.
As we peddle I record a little video on our a experience and the heartwarming HUGE smile on my co-pilot’s face as she tells me “it’s easy, it’s easy” ………
We get out in the middle of the lake a beautiful refreshing breeze blows in so we decide to take a break, call up some more Jamie Grace and sing some “happy tunes” to the fish and enjoy this beautiful day!
It was perfect…… the wind is gently rocking our boat……. our hearts are Happy as we sing with Jamie and send up our enthusiastic (possibly a little off key but very joyful noise to the lord)……
We are having SO much FUN SINGING AND FLOATING we do not notice how far from our boat dock we are getting……..AND we have peddled so many times in circles because our boat steering device seemed to be faulty!……… but no fear…….WE ARE HAVING FUN!
So as the RESPONSIBLE ONE IN CHARGE HERE……… when I look around…… start squinting and attempting to see the boat rental dock! I realize one is BARELY within site but I am pretty sure that is the one that was closed for the day…….. rentals are only being offered on the Canawaga Day Use Side today!
Wow, I say to myself, pretty sure we are not going to return this rental on time….. LOL
Although I have GREAT Hope and Faith that I can continue to make this predicamate that I seem to have gotten us into continue to turn out FUN.
The HOPE side in my head decides to pull out the trusty cell phone and check to be sure that the boat rental dock that I can barely see isn’t the right one……. I call up the GPS for Canowaga day use area HOPING IT IS THE ONE THAT IS BARELY IN SITE……..LOL
My happy co-pilot and I are now laughing very hard and realizing WE HAVE A LONG WAY TO PEDDLE!!
Now is when I decide I better reach out to another friendly co-worker who is also out in the community……. Is it a bad sign when you pull out the GPS in the middle of a LAKE hoping it tells you the boat landing you can hardly see is the RIGHT one……. because if it isn’t THAT MEANS the one you NEED is out of site? LOL
….Where are you??? She asks from two counties away and on land……… a few funny texts go back and forth and she encourages me to call the rental office.
FYI texting and peddle boating (when you have drifted out into nowhere land is safe) even if we could have gotten enough speed up against the wind there was nothing to run into…..LOL
Well ….. many recordings……. operational times….. and many selections later ……. NO HELP THERE!
We are still laughing very hard as we continue our attempt to peddle this boat back.
I keep offering many positive praises and silly conversation as my mind makes a NEW plan “I am SOOO Proud of you” I tell her “it’s easy” she responds.
A few fisherman have been afloat on the lake with us during our excursion, unfortunately they are barely in site as well. I snap a photo and tell my land bound likeness …….. “We might have to peddle up to that fisherman to see if he can tow us in” I text with a laughing emoji………..
I send the pic………
the reply comes back GOOD LUCK WITH THAT……….
“I know!” I text back….. I am feeling pretty incompetent right now!
They really shouldn’t allow me to be in charge of anything or anybody……….
BUT WE ARE LAUGHING HARD AND HAVING FUN WITH THIS……..AND MY VEST DOES HAVE A WHISTLE………. thumbs up for that one!!!
The breeze that has been blowing into us and challenging our ability to move forward pics up a bit more!……..
“This might be a good thing” I tell my co-pilot…..
Maybe I can take my lifevest off and use it as a sail…….. you blow the whistle…..
So this is when GOD intervenes ……………………
Some how we get close enough to the fisherman in the John boat who was barely visable.
Now…….. I need to tell you that my dad has NOT been alive for eleven years…….. and he would NEVER have been floating in a boat in a lake fishing……. but GOD FOUND HIS LIVING TWIN AND SENT HIM TO ME TO GIVE ME A STERN LECTURE ABOUT EVERYTHING I WAS DOING WRONG…… AND THEN PROCEDED TO GET ME OUT OF THIS MESS!
Although I am NOT sure……. I suspect he may have seen us earlier floating and happily singing off key to the fish and felt WE were the reason he was not catching fish today.
As he is telling me, in a somewhat sharp tone “you have to steer it”…..\ “that thing in the middle is how you steer it” ………..
I was so glad to see him, but I must say I was a bit annoyed at his lack of confidence in my peddle boating abilities ……. not to mention at this point my co-pilot keep laughing and telling him “we need help” “we need help” only adding to my feelings of inadequacy.
Between laughing and attempting to respond to what “my stand in dad” is telling me to do, I do manage to stand up for myself and my abilities with a slighty sharp reply “we are not the problem……”It’s not us” It’s the wind and there seems to be something wrong with the rutter”
After several kind attempts at throwing us a rope and towing us while holding onto the rope fail. He changes the plan to “I am going to pull you up against the boat and you just hook your arm over the side and hold on”….. “Can you do that?” (my God sent stand in Dad sternly asked me) “I sure can” I eagerly reply as I bust out laughing and do as he says!
Myself and my co-pilot peddle our hearts out along side our rescue boat.
Every once in awhile I look over to see her smiling face and give her praise “I am SO proud of you” I tell her. “We NEEDED HELP” she laughs.
As I am sitting here writing this my heart is full!
I love when the silly predicaments I find myself in paint a much bigger story of clarity and guidance in my life struggles.
When life throws us into very difficult situations and every day Life Uncertainties are constantly looming over us. We often go into the very familiar survival mode and direct our focus on being strong and walking forward and staying alive for those who need us.
As my co-pilot stated “WE NEED HELP” ……. God sends us Help hopefully we realize it and accept it when it shows up.
I am so grateful for the people God leads me to who fill my heart with Joy and Love, and give me Wisdom to know what to do next.
“THE BEST WAY TO FIND YOURSELF IS TO LOSE YOURSELF IN THE SERVICE OF OTHERS”
Mahatma Gandhi
Stay small and continually watch for the Wisdom God is sending you!
Accept and Appreciate the Help from the people He sends to help you…….. Even when they show up with a fatherly lecture about all the things you are doing wrong…… lol
And Do Life Big for others…….
With Love, Hope, Joy and Peace, Carmela